From trade-union politics let's go to the cultural page
In recent days, news broke about a sensational discovery happened in Palermo
To find out more let's watch the following report
our contributor Rosolino Pizzuto
let's watch the shot
It's an honour for me to have a great poet like you dear Goethe
-The honour is all mine, dear Piazzi. -Danke schoen!
In recent days they have found
some film spools of 'The return of Cagliostro'
a legendary film which for more than half century ago they dreamt it existed
They were lying in a pile of junk
in a small second-hand shop in Ballarò
A teacher found them by true coincidence, his name being Ernesto Mascellaro
Professor, did you ever thought that these spools contained
a film regarded as a cult by every cinema-lover?
Frankly no. I thought it was an amateur film
Instead?
Instead I consulted a friend who is a cinema critic
Doctor Gregorio Napoli
who told me he made some research and discovered that it's
the film 'The return of Cagliostro'
But have you ever heard about this film and the old Sicilian cinema?
No. I think those names are so old that anyone forgot about them
Obviously our pleasant professor doesn't know that in Sicilia soon after
the Lumière invention were active some cinematographic societies
Indeed for more than 30 years between Palermo e Catania,
many films were made, outcome of the efforts by men, artists and benefactors who nurtured the dream
to make Sicily the capital of Italian cinema
The film that you're going to see tells the story of 'The return of Cagliostro'
and of the Sicilian cinematographic society that produced it
This is our sincere tribute
to those pioneers of Sicilian cinema
whose name today fell into oblivion
Doctor Napoli? I'm listening!
But how was the Sicialian cinema society born?
The name of Trinacria is striclty linked to those who founded it
the brothers Carmelo e Salvatore La Marca
They were 2 craftmen specialized in building sacred statues and furnishings
which they sold to churches
We are here, more than half a century laterin their workshop
A decaying builiding left in the deepest deterioration
Totally unknown today
There's also a small flock, a flock of skimpy sheep
And I ask myself, I ask you
if these sheep can be taken
as the symbol of contemporary Italian cinema
What do you think?
Napoli, but are you provoking?
Would you take it home?
Father, you're right, but I have got nothing to do with it
It's useless getting angry at me, I'm the least important person
Fuck, what is it bothering up your arse!
I'm doing the counting! What's all this rackage?
To me you are all the same It's a disgrace
He's tormenting me since 3 hours I've got nothing to do with it
Ginetto! What's all this hubbub? Ginetto!
Uncle Totò, you're right. But there's a small problem with father Lo Bue
Can you come a minute?
Goodmorning father Lo Bue
Goodmorning my arse, uncle Totò. Do you call this goodmorning?
Ginetto, go back to work
What's wrong father Lo Bue? All looks fine to me
Uncle Totò, can't you see what's wrong?
No really
Put eyeglasses on
I don't see anything
Look better
I'm looking
- Carmelo! - Coming!
Don't worry father Lo Bue, I'll sorti it out
Take it
My brother Sal
Goodmorning gentlemen, can I be of any service to you?
Carmelo, the statue
It's beautiful, it's very beautiful
Tell me something are you really a fool or do you pretend it in order not to pay?
I'm sorry father Lo Bue, without lacking in respect
say, but are you trying to provoke me? I mean, just to understand!
I won't tell you what happened when we put it in the courtyard of the parish youth club
What happened Mrs Vaccaro? Miss, please
I beg your pardon, Miss
What happened was, Mr La Marca that many young boys and girls laid
their innocent looks on this... on this obscenity. That's what happened
Pardon me, I don't understand, say, what's the problem?
Carmelo, this is the problem
You see, besides, after all, it's all proportioneted
After all it's not a child. It's a young man
This is true too, father Lo Bue
Anyway Mr La Marca, this is not gonna end here
I will talk to father Vitellaro, and however it ends it ends
Mrs Vacaro
Miss, father Lo Bue, Miss
Miss... Vaccaro
Alleluia, alleluia. The Lord is great, The Lord is good. Alleluia
You're good
I say, have you got tram tickets into your brain? Brother
You've got to be careful!
Carmelo
do you hear me? Carmelo
Totò
fuck, she's so beautiful... I'd eat her
Carmeloo
Carmelo, it'd be wonderful if,
we could make a film with someone like her
A dream
Goodday
To the cardinal sent me... to the...Sucante
said... he has to speak it with you
Sucante (THE CARDINAL)
Cardinal... yes
has to speak with you...
has to speak with you immediately
Sucante
Who is this Cardinal?
The Cardinal has to speak with you,
can't speak us... has to speak about you the Cardinal
immediately... thanks
thanks...thanks
sucato...
Com'in
I'm waiting for the Da Mancia brothers... out
I am father Bernardo
I came to bring a song of hope
that I like a lot
thanks... thanks
Thanks
all right I got it. Get the fuck off my face and let them in
thanks... thanks...thanks
-Of hope... thanks -Go away!
-Please come on in!
It's a true pleasure to see you again, your Eminence
I beg your pardon
And most of all to revere the beauty and the grace of your mother
Yours servants
-Dear friends, I called you... -MOTHER (fart)
Out of the way, old scabby one
You know I like to stay with you Vincenzino (little Vincenzo)
Don't you see I'm making a shawl for you. Do you like it?
You are disgusting, and the shawl too
Your Eminence, there's only one mother
Dear friends I called you to give you the Gospel
Finally today your dream becomes true
Thanks to the fraternal commitment of these friends,
that I'm going to introduce you, the cinematographic Trinacria is a reality
Tahnks... Eminence, thanks, Eminence You are a true saint. Thanks
It's no me who you're supposed to thank but...
these very important and generous friends
The eminent honourable Porcaro,
Dott. Conigliaro, general director of Bank of Sicily,
who granted you a big loan
to start the cinematographic Trinacria
I don't know who the other two are
You shouldn't thank us
We've invested in this company giving the highest trust to Your Eminence,
rather, I say, Cardinal I'd like to talk to you in private
with our friends' permission
Come along, Porcaro
Eminence?
Don't worry about it. What do you want to tell me?
Eminence, we always highly trusted you
but are you sure that these two are able to run a film company?
Have you taken a good look?
Forget it, we are stubborn
Carmelo, Salvatore tell about your idea to the honourable Porcaro
Eminence,
Honourable...it was always our dream to make films
And making films in our land, here, in our beautiful Sicily
And this sun, this sea, this light
nobody ever cared to really do it
Our motherland, enough now, enough
We Sicilians have got a pride that nobody can take away
Eminence, all is well what ends well
Allow me, a quick one
The wolf has got his measure too. Do you know what is it?
No!
A sheepy sky
Restivo?
-Yes, Eminence -I'm vomiting
The debut opera film that starts the Trinacria is 'The life of S. Rosalia'
directed by the good Ermete Patricola
A cineaste, who evolved making films of different genre
About this film, made in 1947, I keep a rare finding
A poster I'm gonna show you. Here you go
Congratulations, dott. Napoli. It's really beautiful
Thanks S. Rosalia. I beg you to heal... I'm feeling sick... everybody...
Stop
Well done. An applause to everybody,
operator, film, videocamera, machinist, sound
Really good
And with a voice, say, full of emotion
I guarantee you, with the birth of the cinematographic Trinacria
Cinecittà will be scared
Bravo!
Thank you, thanks. The La Marca brothers, here present, guarantee you, assure you,
with the help of Cardinal Sucato, his Eminence,
that we'll be second to none
Hurray the Trinacria!
Bless!
Hurray to S. Rosalia. Hurray
I've got with me, an article printed on the daily paper "L'Ora" dated 15/10/1947
Do you know what it says?
No really
Here, I'll tell you. Trinacria disappointing. A failure
I ask myself, what's the need of resuming such dirty things?
They've got nothing to do with cinema
Dear Saint! Palermo is scourged by the plague
Our city. What are we supposed to do?
What do we have to do?
Hunter, go to Palermo and bring the cardinal here
Take these bones to heal all Palermo
I'm going, I'm going
Go away!
S. Rosalia grant me a favour
Long live Palermo and S. Rosalia
S. Rosalia grant a favour to me and all my family
I've got one only child, a soldier, who went to war. Let him come back alive
Thank you my saint, thank you Thank you my saint, thank you
You granted me this favour, to me and to all my family, to all Palermo
My dear saint, you granted a favour to my children. Thank you my dear saint
People of Palermo, quiet. Go home 'cause I granted a miracle
Eminence, let me tell you that I'm speechless
Honourable Porcaro, what do you mean?
Can't you see it's a masterpiece?
...piece
Eminence, I beg your pardon, a true example of surreal cinema
My cute son, my cute son. My cute son
Shut up!
Restivo?
Yes, your Eminence
What were you saying?
Surreal, your Eminence
Surreal my cock
And don't forget to bring the La Marca brothers tomorrow morning
Did you understand?
Dott. Conigliaro, you are the son of the then general director of Bank of Sicily
Giacomo Conigliaro. We can say that your father contributed
decisively to the birth of the cinematographic Trinacria?
I've got to tell you that for many years in my house, the production of the so called film
'The life of S. Rosalia' was a cause of general dread
Can we say that your father soon regreted about that financing?
I can tell you more, I still see my dad's good soul telling me
how deeply disgusted he was watching that film
Really?
Yes, he, until the last days of his life felt ashamed for having contributed
decisively, unfortunately, to the birth of this Trinacria
Madam, did your husband use to make films?
He used to make films but he suffered a lot for his passion toward cinema
and he went through bad times
And then he made the life of S. Rosalia
He made the life of S. Rosalia. Don't remind me 'cause it hurts too much
And how did the film go?
He made the film with great devotion
But nobody appreciated it
and he suffered so much and the Cardinal too gave him so much pain
that he got unwell and died of a broken heart
You've got to go
And why do I have to go?
I've got one son only, in America. Go away! Where are you my son?
Fuck, it's disgusting, uncle Pietro, we want the ticket money back
What's your name, child?
Gregorio
Do you like the film?
Nice
Would you like a candy?
Fuck off
Have you ever heard about the Count of Cagliostro who was born around here?
No
Never heard?
There's a house bearing his name, to his memory. Don't you know him?
Do you know where is Cagliostro's house?
Go further down
A bit further. Thank you very much
After many reserves, we arrived at the house where in 1743
the count of Cagliostro was born
Napoli?
Tell me
How come the La Marcas after a countless series of flops
made the Cagliostro's project?
Actually, it's difficult going back to the origin of 'The return of Cagliostro'
I can only venture an hypothesis
Go ahead
Probably they were struck, enchantered by the film 'Cagliostro'
directed in 1949 by a Russian cineaste, Gregory Ratoff
And played?
and played by a corrupt, sulphureous, and unparalled Orson Welles
The pain you're feeling will last a little bit long, you feel it's vanishing already
Now you feel the pain going away, tell me that you feel the pain going away
I have to declare beforehand that everything said, published, assumed until now
about this event is highly approximate and inaccurate
I can tell you that it was crucial the intervention of a person unknown by historians
The baron Cammarata
A man extremely fond of esotericism, magical arts, who intended
to revalue the character of Cagliostro, vilified with the character played by Orson Wellles
Are we joking, Ginetto? This company is 100 years old
and a filth like this was never made
This is not the Madonna, Ginetto. This is Tarzan's monkey
Uncle Totò, you hurt me in my intimacy. This is my mother
Your mother? Tarzan's monkey? Are you drunk, Ginetto?
Your brother told me to make the sorrow face of Madonna
He says it's the new realism
It's... the new realism, Ginetto.
My mother, uncle Totò, is lying on a bed since two years without being able to move
Your brother told me: copy your mother's face and fit it to Madonna
Not only I make things as you comand but I also have to take scorn
Therefore my mother looks like Tarzan's monkey?
Uncle Totò
Ginetto? Chief
Go to work
We kiss your hands (goodbye)
You're right father Camarda Fuck she's really ugly!
Since we've put it near the altar the church is empty. Nobody is coming
Surely
Totò?
Carmelo, camorria!
Totò, my brother, 'the uncle from America'
the great success announced by Trinacria at Vittoria cinema
from the public request
after two day it was taken away
After two days?
And viewers?
-Fifty? -Five
Whom four were invited
And the other one was sleeping as usual
Totò, I've got to tell you: The uncle of this big...
Carmelo! Father Camarda is here
Some dignity!
But father Camarda is part of the family
Do you know what's it like to pawn even the nails on the walls!
Totò, today we did tombola
Goodmorning
I have to talk him, the Mr. Cardinal to Sucando
You've got to talk to Mr. Ennio Cammarata, the baron
Your Eminence, do you know the difference between a tyre and a woman?
Get away, useless thing
I summoned you to introduce my friend, the Baron
Cammarata. The greatest expert
about the Count of Callosto
Cagliostro, Eminence... Cagliostro
All right, it's the same thing
The man who will save the Trinacria
that is, Eminence
that is your arse!
At this point of the story, the La Marcas received a great responsibility
They had to find a director up to the task. Who did they choose?
The choice went for Pino Grisanti. An honest artisan who was working for
the Zagara film, competing against Trinacria
Grisanti's leitmotif was without a doubt: "The invincible blessed Pauls"
loosely based on Luigi Natoli's novel
It's interesting because it shows a secret Palermo, an underground Palermo
a Palermo loaded with those misteries, that develop later through the years
which maybe afflict the Sicilian capital even today.
How can it be possible to call Pino Grisanti a director?
Try to watch, if you manage, "The invincible blessed Pauls"
Duke della Motta, you'll pay for your faults!
Duke, are you ready to repent?
Ah, ah, coward, I'm not scared of you. I'm not afraid of someone who hides
what do you mean?
Show your snouts if you dare
They even say that Natoli's descendents wanted to sue Grisanti
and the Zagara Film like the press at that time shows
The poetess Antonietta Scalisi Bonetti is the only authoress, known around
who dedicated a monograph about the director Pino Grisanti. Poetess?
How can I help!
How come did you devote a great deal of your life
about studying this Sicilian director??
Because I was always fascinated
by this great creative genius
A person, I'd say a personality...
Would you know if Grisanti left a preliminary work for the film?
Neither me nor anyone else, as long as I know, found any trace of a film-script,
screenplay, rough draft or whatever. Nothing
However, however, witnesses at that time seem to say
that for the whole month prior the shooting of the film
both the La Marca brothers and the director Grisanti attended assiduously, by night,
the Baron Cammarata's house
Fucking lightning!
Watch out for the thunder
You should know, gentlemen, that I devoted my entire life
to the study of the occult and to the exoteric sciences
Exo?
Terics
Things of science, Carmelo
Fondamental things. And at the end of this long and hard path
of studying and reseaching to which I devoted my best years
I met him
Him who?
I beg your pardon, I'm very nervous
Him who?
The master. He who with his powerful occult arts, more than anyone else,
more than the same Merlin, got near the Prime Mover
Fuck, what kind of bollocks
Sorry?
Nothing Mr. Baron
I was saying that this Prime Mover was irresistibly fascinating
Well, fascinating yes, but, if you allow me Mr. Baron, a bit difficult
Surely gentlemen, I forgot that you are filmakers
And that's why I searched for you,in order that, through the magic of the big screen
also the mob can know the infinite virtues of the Count
And honour him in the world without end
-Amen -Amen
I've got to tell you gentlemen, that in order for staging this film
I sold everything I owned without any second thought
May I say, Mr. Baron, you are an hero
And we will do everything possible to make sure this film becomes
a masterpiece that the world will remember forever
Totò don't move
I'm here, Carmelo.
I was sure I could count on you friends
Polifemo, Polifemo
Fucking hell, what a monster
Who are these 3 pieces of shit. Throw them out 'cause they stink
Ehi! Baron. I'll break your horns. Cockholded and rotten
Carmelo! Dont' you understand he's possessed by the spirit
What spirit?
The spirit of Cagliostro
I'm going away. He's bonkers
Throw blood from your horns, son of a bitch
Sit down idiot. He has to give us the money. Do you understand?
The both of you disgust me
Aye, you're nice instead! Look into the mirror, dog face
One thing is sure gentlemen
We should find an actor
up to the task
A true star
Do you have someone in your mind already?
In the past days the famous American star Erroll Douglas, arrived in Sicily
He was welcomed by the producers Carmelo and Salvatore La Marca
from the Trinacria and the director Pino Grisanti, the 3 of them major
figures of the reviving Sicilian cinema
Douglas was accompanied by his wife, the charming dancer Elisabeth Burnett
Erroll Douglas will stay a few weeks in the sunny island to interpret the part
of the legendary Cagliostro, character shown on the big screen last year already
by the colleague Orson Welles
Obviously there were also the admirers of the unforgettable
hero of 'The Alamo', crowded around the actor
for the due autograph
The first shot of 'The return of Cagliostro', this is the film title,
was made in front
the most important Sicilian authorities and blessed by His Eminence
the cardinal Vincenzo Sucato, Archibishop of Palermo
There were many actors that the director Grisanti picked up from the streets
What do these likable people expect from the cinema?
That I, today, tomorrow, may become a great actor and go to Rome
Burt Lancaster, Kirk Douglas...
I am happy to work with the Trinacria
And while the maestro stays apart thinking about the next shot
the star doesn't hide his enthusiasm
Best wishes to the future Hollywood and the Conca d'oro (Palermo's Valley)
Erroll Douglas was one of Hollywood most versatile actors
He had a fantastic careear playing the most diverse roles
from noir to horror up to William Shakespeare
Erroll Douglas landing in Palermo, in the Holy Year,
is a man irreparably heading on the decline
Only the whisky bottle is left as his only faithful partner
But Hollywood wasn't cruel with its drunken sons
nor his friend Robert Siodmak, kicked him up his arse
sent them to scrap in Italy
Erroll's manager, Vincent Cusumano, scraped up for him small roles in minor films
The American B series becomes Z series in Italy
Erroll, I'd like to introduce you to these friends
They want to make a little Sicilian Hoollywood
Mr Vincent, what did he tell us?
That it's a very beautiful thing and that it'll have a great success
Carmelo...
In late spring of 1950, Pino Grisanti started the making of
'The return of Cagliostro'
With great excitement and some pride I'd like to show you
the costume fittings of Erroll Douglas and some auditions by actors from Palermo
picked up from the streets, who participated to the making of the film
Erroll Douglas' auditions
Giordano Carlo's audition
The poetry I'm gonna to recite is by Giacomo Leopardi. The title is "To the moon"
Oh sweet moon, I remember now that last year...
-Granny, what a beautiful eyes you've got -To look better at you
-What a nice little nose you've got -To smell you better
-Granny what a big mouth you've got! -Didn't you look at granpa's cock?
Good evening. I'm Wolfgang Goethe
Mrs Burnett, what memories do you have about your staying in Palermo with Erroll Douglas, your husband?
I remember very well. How could I forget that trip, it was incredible. I remember...
those strange people, their strange way of living and those unuasual places
In fact I was so struck that with my small videocamera,
I decided to film people,
places and, obviously, Erroll
I still keep the film in a safe place because it represents a very
important and unusual part of my life
The set was unbeliavable, the people were incredible. I could not understand
how people so incompetent could manage to make a film
The director, his name was Grisanti, was bonkers! He was completely mad
There were the producers then, or so called producers
They were two brothers, La Marca
They had no idea how to make a film
I never saw anything to resemble this in America
My husband Erroll was obviously disheartened by all of that because he was used to work
with people who were real professionals
He was at the top of the tree
and it was humiliating for him being directed by someone like Grisanti
Clearly Erroll was very depressed and I have to admit I was too
I feel that the situation in Palermo speeded up the end of our marriage
We've had...
our problems in the past, Erroll was drinking a bit
and we weren't very happy
but the circumstance we found
ourselves in Palermo made things worse and Erroll started drinking heavily
and becoming ever more unhappy
and I really feel that was the beginning of the end of our marriage
The scene you're gonna see is set in the famous villa of monsters in Bagheria
so called for the bizarre sculptures from 1700, placed outside the villa
by its owner, the prince of Palagonia
In here Grisanti pictures with audacious imagination that Cagliostro meets the great
German poet Goethe and other renowed characters from Palermo, to propose to them
an incredible experiment From "The return of Cagliostro" 1950
Do the gentlemen wish something?
No nothing, thanks Battista
As you wish
And yet it's like so, count of Cagliostro
For example?
They'd say what half of Europe says
That you are a swindler
Who dared waking us up from our eternal sleep?
For this reason you will all die
We'll suck your blood
I'm scared, Count
You're a piece of shit
Miss Burnett, since the situation was so dramatic
how come Douglas did not want to go back to America?
I've asked myself the same question many times without finding an answer
Often my husband used to say 'Liz, pack the lugguage, we're going back to America'
I was going to prepare the lugguage
and then nothing happened, we never left
Danke schoen, herr Cagliostro
I beg your pardon Count, but what could happen if we'd make a mistake?
Piazzi, you are a scientist. What do you think is it going to happen? Absolutely nothing
aaahhhh...
I am the mummy of Tutankan Damned you!
How dare you waking me from my eternal sleep? You will all die for this
You will all die!
ahhhh...ahhh
I don't understand what you're talking about
No good, I don't understand
What don't you understand, idiot. Go back to America
Pino?
They come here to break our balls
Oh! There's smoke, I can't breath in here Go to work
Another moron coming to bust the balls
Mr Douglas, will you please? At your disposal
What happened?
Nothing happened
Is everything ok?
Surely in this film Erroll Douglas was forced
to perform for freaks, shrimps and monsters
No monsters in the meaning of the hollywoodian ones
actors of the same calibre of George Raft or Barbara Stanwyck
whom with Douglas worked at the peak of his success
The tragicomic apex of this cast is reached in the scene of the carriage
where Pino Grisanti chosen to substitute Douglas
to play the part of the astrophysicist Piazzi, such Carlo Giordano
An actor literally able to talk only nonsense
Look outside, sponger
Tell me, what's so adventurous in going in the middle of the night to cave
number 845 of one 485, 360, that everyone calls incorrectly witch?
My dear Count...465, 865, 885, 750, 455... intellectual and spiritual may 850...
Shut up, incoherent
Nothing...450... nothing We've got to do it again
Goodday
Goodday, how can I help?
I'm sorry, we're looking for a patient
Where can we find him?
You can find him in the nurse's room, ask over there, and they'll tell you
-Thanks -You're welcome
-Godday -Godday
Listen, we're looking for an American patient, Mister Douglas
Please
-Who is it? -The actor
Ah! The actor?
The one who is always locked in his room and never wants to go out
The one who always shouts
Yes, he always shouts. He's unbearable
Listen, where can we find him?
There's the manager
Story goes that he's ospitalized in a psychiatric hospital in 1951
following a psychomotor agitation due to a commotion
in an alcoholic individual
Douglas was a person inclined to isolate himself
and to place himself in rooms' corners
Yet he was going around with an old wig trying to hypnotize, making tricks
all over the psychiatric hospital
Managing such a patient is also very difficult
Bear in mind that he's very old
He's also got dementia symptoms
Therefore he can't control his impulses
and can become aggressive against himself and against other patients
We manage him with great difficulty and we are not able to engage
Mr Douglas, do you hear me?
Come out
There are the guys from the tv
It was fault of that damned set
I can't tell you anything
about the incident 'cause I left to the States a few days before
the situation was driving me crazy and I was gonna have a nervous breakdown
aaahhhhh
Stop rolling
What happened?
He's all broken!
Pasquale, stop everything
To your service, professor
Let me get upstairs, 'cause these ones are all lost
Sometimes destiny can be particularly cruel toward men
keeping for them a nasty fate, no doubt that
the poor Erroll Douglas was one of those men
I'd like that you'd put aside the story told up to now
and would listen another one
A story maybe less heroic and adventurous but probably closer to the truth
and most of all more informative regarding the human nature
The time when the Trinacria made its films was a mysterious
and dark period for Sicily
Those were the years of separatism and of Giuliano's banditry
and most of all of the renewed harmony between the Sicilian Cosa Nostra
and the American Cosa Nostra
The author, the mastermind of such a great work
was the greatest genius of organized crime
Salvatore Lucania
He doesn't ring a bell, doesn't he? And you are right
Because the whole world knows him by the name of Lucky Luciano
Well then, to sum up
First: behind the Trinacria there was Lucky Luciano
Second: Luciano's righthand was the enlightned Cardinal Sucato
who with his powerful connections assured any kind of support for the Trinacria
Third: also the La Marca brothers, as strange it may seem
were men of honour since 1937
Fourth: the same goes for the genius of Sicilian cinema Pino Grisanti
A paranoic with persecution mania who was never a man of honour though
Fifth: here is Vincent Cusumano Erroll Douglas' manager
The man who brought to Sicily the ex hollywood divo, ruining him forever
John Cusumano's nephew, trusted deputy of Luciano, Vincent
owned more than just a favor to his powerful boss who, in various occasions helped him
to come out of bad situations linked to his gambling debts
I repeat it, sometimes destiny is particularly cruel against some men
When in autumn 1949, Cusumano took Erroll Douglas to Luciano
in his magnificent house, Erroll could have never imagined
that day would have been for him the beginning of his end
This way
Cuckolded
It's truly admirable the zeal with which those two are preparing
Mr Douglas' ruin
Rolling
81-1 first
Action
A few more seconds, and our hero,the powerful Cagliostro will break right here
aaahhhhh...
Mr Douglas, have you broken anything? Do you need help?
Cuckold, let's take him to the hospital
Mamma mia! I feel sorry for him
Mr Douglas, how are you? Did you hurt yourself? Shall we take him to the hospital?
Human imbecility makes more victims than the Messina's earthquake
You're right. It' just like that
Madonna of Carmine. I've got to really change barber
Peppino, total turn
Let's see together how this bad story ends
The fall was really bad
The most powerful magician in Europe is all broken
Poor thing, how much he suffers
But he's lucky in disgrace though
Are you kidding him?
I'm telling the truth
Because if he'd know what's happeing over there
his suffering would be much worse
Be aware yourselves how miserable and vultures
the so called human beings are
Maestro Grisanti,
the genious of Trinacria
Totò, oh my brother, I'll tell you more, the Vittorio de Sica
of my cock
Will you shut up 'cause you're making my brain rot. You've got to calm down
Ah! Have I? This thief and pimp ruined my life
and I'm supposed to calm down
Do you know when I calm down? As soon as I'll eat his throat
Piece of shit
Pour blood out of your horns, idiot
Your stock is foolish
Who the fuck is this Cagliostro?
Fuck, but where are we, among the Mao Mao?
And you, do you think to be smarter than him?
Poor thing, he woke him up with all this shouting
He's throwing out his soul Doesn't he make pity?
Him pity? And now that his godfather comes and bugger us
None would feel sorry fur us? Ain'it? No, because the arse is ours
Gentlemen, I'd have a suggestion
Let's be clear my horse is lamed...
Sorry, what horse are you talking about?
The American donkey, half-wit
I'll make you swallow the toupee idiot from the war
Will you shut up and let him talk?
please...
Thank you. As it is now I don't have any use of him
What a shame
Life goes on. But he had the misfortune of meeting three bunglers like you
Vincent, easy, Eh!
I call people with their real names
But I can give you the chance to save your arse
How?
Simple! It'll be me who will tell my godfather, my godfather...
Mr Luciano?
Yeah!
A saint of a man
I was saying I'll tell him personally how things went
I'll tell him that poor Erroll, more pissed than ever, fell off the window
during a break. He'll believe me
Thanks, Vicè, thank you. Thanks from the bottom of my heart. Thanks
Mr Vincent, forgive me if I judged you wrongly
Dickheads both of you Didn't you understand what his point is?
A cuckhold (man of shit)
But sharper than you both
And who's got it?
Uncle Vincenzo, we haven't even got eyes left to cry
500... dollars?
50.000 dollars!
We might as well go directly to Uncle Luciano. Dead for dead...
That's your buisness. It's me who's risking
What then?
All right, what can we do?
Ok! But you are a bit heavy, Mr. Vincent
Will you tell me who is this cuckhold of Cagliostro?
Santino don't let anyone disturbing us, I urge you
Today we are only for the present friends
What's wrong Vincenzo, don't you like it? When have you ever refused spaghetti with tomato?
What's wrong? Are you feeling ill? Is anything bothering you?
Talk to your friends
Nothing don Salvatore. All is fine. I'm not hungry. There's no problem
How can you eat uncle Totò?
After a dear friend suffered a bad accident
how can he eat? His stomach is blocked. Isn't it true Vincenzo?
Certainly a friend is like a great treasure
You've got to protect and look after him
Without any distraction ever
Let's have a toast in the meantime. Cheers Vicè
Surely a lunch a bit heavy for Mr Cusumano
Unfortunately also on the idyll between Sucato and the Lumière of Sicilian cinema
the curtain are about to falls
A bit of patience, cinema is tiring
ln nomine Patri, fili et spiritu santi
What are your sins my son?
Out of the way
Father, I want to get rid of a terrible secret
What's this stink?
It smells like goat's?
Yeah, it's unbearable
I can't get rid of you. Don't worry, carry on
The American got badly hurt
Is he dead?
No, but he's all broken
Whose fault?
It's La Marca's, who else?
And you've got nothing to do with it?
Me? I'm innocent like a little lamb
-Pinò? -Eh?
What did you come for?
I'd like you could talk to the "friends"
letting them know that I've nothing to do with what happened
You want to save your arse? Don't you?
It's human, His Eminence. And I promise if you grant me the favour I'll go on pilgrimage to S. Rosalia
Vincenzino do him that favor Don't be always bad
Get out damned oldie, I can't stand you 'cause you stink
Restivo?
Out of the way
Did you like Grisanti's joke?
If you allow me, Eminence, I found it a bit tasteless
Pinò? Padre Restivo thinks that your story is a bit tasteless
-Taste? -Less
Get your arm off my head
Pinò there's nothing to do
Mamma mia, what horrible carts
Poor fools, they don't know that their Vincent Cusumano
the favourite of the powerful Lucky Luciano won't be able to help them
And they will wait, and wait
will wait
Carmelo, there's something going around me
Totò, what is it going around you?
My cock is going around
American, I and my brother are sorry
I and my brother are two shits but we've got to leave you here
If we don't do it they're gonna make our arse like a mountain (heavy beatings)
I'm going Pippino. Goodbye
I'm sorry Excellence if I'm coming to disturb you in such a happy moment
You can't dance
What are you saying my son
You can't dance, you look like a dead pussycat
What are you talking about my son?
that you are disgusting
Eminence
How can I help Baron?
Eminence, I'd like to ask if you know anything about the film shooting
I haven't seen any of La marca's brothers
What film are you talking about?
What do you mean, Eminence, what film?
The film about Cagliostro
The film I financed and that you standed as a guarantor
Restivo! What film is he talking about?
Baron, don't bust my balls
What are you saying my son?
Shut up shity bitch
Poor baron, he doesn't know yet that his money went completely lost
Poor baron cheated by these swindlers
Pretty soon he'll be locked into a madhouse by a greedy nephew
And he'll die broken and totally mad
After all the enlightned and noble cardinal Sucato won't survive long
the unlucky Cammarata
Well dear friends, here ends the tragic story
of Trinacria and the men who were involved in it
Men who were, without a doubt, incapable, incompetent
and almost always true rogues
In spite of all of that, I feel particularly sorry for these men
I'll tell you more, even liking Why?
Frankly I wouldn't know how to answer you
Who knows, maybe because loosers give us a sort of attraction
A sense of pity
Who can tell how human soul works
Ah! I forgot, and the La Marca brothers?
Nobody knew anything
I think that since a while they went high, very high
Where they eventually produce succesfull films
Maybe
They know how miracolous they are
Ah, maestro, we forgot. There'd be a minor independent producer
who would like to retake the filming of 'The return of Cagliostro'
would you be interested by any chance? Subtitles by Akum (KG)